An Excerpt from PICKING UP THE PIECES: A Guide to Recoveryfrom Betrayal and a Broken Heart © 2004by Dinah S. Temple
What is Unconditional Love and How Can You Tell When You Have It?
Love is an intangible emotion, which cannot be touched or seen.
It can however, be witnessed by anyone with an open and willing heart.
As the saying goes though, love is blind and telling the difference between mere infatuation and real love may be a difficult task at times.
Love comes in many forms.
Infatuation has been defined as: Foolish and usually extravagant passion or love or admiration; Temporary love of an adolescent; and An object of extravagant short-lived passion
Conditional love, or loving “if,” is based on someone acting a certain way. In other words, someone who loves with conditions will love a person only if he or she behaves a certain way or lives his or her life in a manner pleasing to the other person.
Reasonable, logical love, or loving “because,” is based on someone loving another because he or she has a certain characteristic or fulfills a need of the other person.
Unconditional love, or loving “in spite of,” is based on someone loving another in spite of what has come to pass or what may come in the future. It is love with no strings attached. It is love without restriction, reservations or conditions. It is the ability to maintain pure love in spite of all odds or circumstances.
On Unconditional Love
Unconditional love is the one that will last a lifetime. This is the type of love everyone seeks.
I know only one way to love, and I believe it’s the right way—that is, all the way, with everything I’ve got.
The romantic in me believes that getting hurt is worth the risk if, ultimately, it leads you to find that one pure love you can rely on. Pure love is worth just about anything.
It’s the kind of love you wait a lifetime for, the kind that takes your breath away and makes you weak in the knees.
It gives you wonderful butterflies in your stomach when you’re about to see your love again. It’s the kind of love that doesn’t diminish over time but, instead, grows stronger as time goes by.Some people are in love with the notion of “being in love”.
After all, no one enjoys the thought of going through life without a lasting intimate love relationship.
So when you begin to feel the flutter of those butterflies as your heart approaches the state of love, be wise and advance slowly. Take the time to get to know your new love in every way possible before you decide whether you are infatuated, or really in love.
Most importantly, make sure that you are both on the same page in the relationship.
Make sure you both have the same understanding of what unconditional love is and what it will take to keep your love alive forever.
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